Embracing Change

Re-envisioning Spiritual Ballerina

I've been going at it non-stop since June. From teaching ballet for Ailey Camp Chicago to Joel Hall Dancers Adult Scholarship Program then upon completion into Joel Hall Dance Company Production of “Nuts & Bolts : In The Mix,”(dancing 6 out of 8 roles en pointe ) on top of filming for my reality show “The Spiritual Ballerina” (airing January 2019) and in between all that working with Elements Ballet . It's been a journey! (A beautiful journey- check my IG page okurr!) A transformative 6 months- I must say! As a result, God has enlarged my capacity in more areas than one. This has been one of the most challenging yet fulfilling seasons of my life. During this time, I've realize that my ability to conquer and overcome challenges is limitless, and my potential for personal happiness and success is infinite. It doesn't become easy it becomes possible. I was quite perplexed by my own ability, power, strength and growth in this season. I knew it wasn't me alone but God was keeping me, molding me and making me whole again!* insert hands lifted emoji So yeah, I had one of the most demanding schedules I've had to date (most people know I keep a packed schedule- when it's not that way, I go crazy smh but this schedule was even a bit much for my own standard) 5am alarms to return home around 10pm and hope to get to bed to fall asleep by 12 to wake up & do it all over again.(crazy right #DontTryThisAtHome ) I was actively moving all day non-stop. 9 hours dancing and 3 hours teaching on some days. My passion, my faith in God, and his grace was my driving force. I say all that to say we can do anything with God. I am blessed. & I don't take my life, nor my gift of dance for granted. I am grateful that I can live out my purpose...purposefully on pointe.

“In every moment a choice exists, we can cling to the past or embrace the inevitability of change and allow a better future to unfold before us.”

I'm at peace with who I've become in these last 6 months. I feel so much love and loads of self-love. The power, radiance and spiritual sensitivity that I feel now began when I decided to truly trust Gods will for my life, even if it looked differently from my vision or differently from the vision I thought God wanted for me. (Y'all know how you have a vision while meditating or whenever you receive one and you think its “something” but its really an illusion we created in our minds and not something from God—yeah that send off vision!) God opened my eyes to see more for myself, and want more for my life. He showed me the value of my worth. To earnestly seek him. It brought me to a new level of trust & faith. Which changed everything for the better. Can I be honest with you? This openness to Gods plan wasn't so easy for me. I stubbornly refused to change my own definition of self because I grew comfortable with its image. I knew what to expect with it, I knew what role to play but then I began to grow unhappy with it. I even wanted to give up dancing because of it. Even though I wanted more for my life, the thought of changing scared me. It's uncertainty gave me anxiety. Change meant me letting go. Letting go of outdated mindsets, old relationships (personal & business related), and anything that would or could hold me back from my bright beaming future. I felt like I was being stripped to the bone. I had to let go of who I thought I needed to be. When I started Spiritual Ballerina, I thought God only wanted me to minister in church settings. It was my assignment for years. Then, my enthusiasm for ministry started to fade. I felt a shift in my ministry. I wanted to do more with my gift outside of the four walls of the church. I wanted to touch more lives and I wanted my creative space to be my sanctuary also. God began to speak over my concerns. He wanted me to minister through dance in any space he led me to, not just in the church or a Christian company. (that brought me some much comfort y'all!) It took me some time to grasp what God and my angels were trying to tell me because I was entangled in the opinions of others and their expectations for my life. It was so hard for me to break free because I was trying to live up to everyone else's expectations rather than Gods. I had to release. I had to take time to hear God for myself in prayer and journaling. Once I let go of the expectations of men, I felt true freedom. A paradigm shift. A new dimension. All of this has led me to my next chapter, a new chapter that I want you to soon share with you!

“ See I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.” Isaiah 43:19

So, join me on my blog as I journey through life. A Spiritual Ballerina, re-defining myself, living out my purpose and trying to find the nearest Starbucks for more coffee! Stay tuned!

Always follow your heart!

-Spiritual Ballerina ~Chantal' Ashante Hill

{ All Photos by Michelle Reid @MReidPhotog }

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